Aliens in Abydos? - Convoying it to Dendera and Abydos

"Do you REALLY want to get shot over another bloody temple!?!" our guide Mahmoud asked us incredulously.  "Do you want your kids to become orphans?  Is this place worth it?"

"Umm...sure," I responded.  "Why not?"

We weren't talking about any ordinary site.  We were discussing the city of Abydos located a few hours north of Luxor.  In ancient Egyptian lore, the evil god Seth killed his good brother Osiris and chopped his body up into several pieces which were strewn over the lands.  Abydos was supposedly the place where his head was buried.  Eventually, Osiris was resurrected by his wife Isis who reassembled his body from all the pieces except one--his penis.  It was eaten by a Nile catfish (that's one reason why they aren't halal).  The poor guy had to wear a strap-on.  Curiously, he and his wife were still able to conceive a child, the god Horus.  Either they had a good assisted reproduction doctor or it was the pool boy.

As the burial site of Osiris' head, Abydos became one of the most religiously important places for the ancient Egyptians.  For thousands of years, pharaohs had built temples  in the region.  First dynasty kings such as Narmer and Aha were buried in Abydos.  Even some predynastic kings were laid to rest here.  But more importantly, Abydos is one of those places where nut-jobs cite as evidence of alien existence.  You know these guys.  They believe they were abducted by UFO's (and possibly even rectally probed).  They think that little green men built the great monuments of antiquity.  They believe that they were some important king or queen in a previous life.  And they also write Stargate fan fiction.  I just wanted to see what all the fuss is about.  When we were planning our vacation to Egypt a few months ago, the final addition was Abydos.  We ended up having to completely rearrange our itinerary to squeeze that in.  When our guide told us that there was a chance that we may not be able to go, I was pissed.

Mahmoud, whose wife is from this region, explained to us that the area around Abydos can sometimes be unsafe.   The people around there tend to be aggressive, mainly to each other.  They can be proud and hot-headed.  Minor misunderstandings could lead to full blown feuds.  During our first week in Egypt, Abydos was closed to foreigners.  We were told that some dangerous criminal had escaped from prison.  His gang operated around this area, so authorities were concerned that tourists may be harmed.  A few days before our planned trip, Abydos was reopened (apparently they caught the guy), but there was some nebulous rumors about a non-tourist vehicle being shot at.  Either way, a police-escorted convoy was instituted for the first time in several years.  Mahmoud joked that the convoy was still better than having an AK-armed policeman in the vehicle.  "Those guys stretch out and take up all the space."   The escorted convoy would make the journey to the closer temple of Dendera, but the question still remained whether we would make it all the way to Abydos.

We had a 5:45 AM wake-up call to meet up with the convoy.  Luckily, the staff of our cruise boat had packed us some breakfast boxes and had coffee, tea, and pastries ready at that hour.

After quaffing many cups of coffee and waiting for what felt like an eternity, the convoy finally departed at 8 AM. 

 About six cars and one large bus started off behind a police vehicle.  Since we were four or five cars back, this would be the last we would see of that police car.  In most countries, cars in an escorted convoy are packed in closely together with police bringing up the front AND the rear.  Our convoy was quickly spaced out over several miles.  Crazy drivers would cut us off, or we would be stuck behind slow moving trucks.  The cars in the front of the convoy kept speeding on without regard for those behind them.  Eventually. we arrived at an important intersection, and we were not sure which of the two roads to take.  The police hadn't even informed the drivers of the route!  All of us including our driver and guide were frustrated by this poorly planned journey.  Why did we have to wake up so early and waste our time with this sham of a convoy system.  It was a fake facade of security.  We eventually arrived at Dendera.  Most of the other convoy vehicles were there sans the police car.

The main surviving temple at Dendera is dedicated to the goddess Hathor.  The current structure dates to the Graeco-Roman period, but like many other Egyptian sites, older temples once stood there.

The face of the cow-eared goddess Hathor used to adorn the 
tops of the pillars, but they were all vandalized in antiquity.

A grindstone for grains carved from the walls of the temple.  Ancient 
structures were often damaged by nearby farmers trying to eke out a living.

This statue of the dwarf god Bes (associated
with childbirth) was found in the ruins
of an adjacent Roman birth house.

There has been recent restorations that have cleaned off thousands
of years of black soot to reveal the beautiful murals on the ceiling.

Some of the most beautiful scenes on the ceiling depict celestial charts including the Zodiac signs which were introduced to Egypt by the Romans.

In addition to the ceiling, the pillars inside the temple are also very ornately painted.

Within the temple is a controversial carving known as the "Dendera light."  Some conspiracy buffs believe that this illustration depicts an electric light bulb, technology way beyond what the ancient Egyptians should have had.  They cite this as another piece of evidence that aliens had given advanced knowledge to ancient civilizations.  However, most Egyptologists believe the picture is merely a lotus flower attached to a djed pillar (a symbol of stability) with a snake inside.  That probably makes more sense, but, then again, I really liked the Stargate movie.

One huge flashlight?

A carving of a huge menat--a large ceremonial necklace used in rituals.  The necklace
stayed in position with a large counterweight that hung down the wearer's back.

One of the most common images seen throughout the temples of ancient Egypt is the goddess Nut giving birth to the sun every morning and swallowing it at sunset.

Hathor's temple at Dendera has the best preserved depiction of Nut (located at the edges of the mural).

In the back of the temple, we climbed down a set of narrow staircases leading to the "crypts" below.  Important artifacts of the temple and offerings to the gods were stored here, not bodies.  During the New Years festival, the sacred statue of the goddess would be brought out of the storage.  The priests would then bring it to the roof of the temple up a long, winding staircase.  There the statue would stay for a day to "recharge" in the light of the rising sun.  Afterwards, the statue would return down a different, straight and steep staircase.  This pathway (also seen at the Edfu Temple) represents the motions of a falcon.  As the bird nonchalantly rises in the air, it takes a circular pattern, but when it dives on prey, it flies in a straight line.

These stairs were used to bring the statue down from the roof.

The "recharging station" for religious artifacts

On the roof of the temple is a replica of the Dendera Zodiac, a circular bas relief carving in the ceiling of the chapel.  The original was cut out by the French in the 19th century and now resides in the Louvre.  It is a full depiction of the constellations and the celestial sky as the Egyptians would have seen it during their time.  The correct age of this piece instigated the "Dendera Affair," a contentious debate between the Catholic Church and scientists who questioned the veracity of Christianity.

On the back wall of the temple is a carving of Cleopatra VII
and her love child with Julius Caesar, Caesarion.

One of my personally favorite carvings depicts the ceremonial,
military, and religious crowns worn by the pharaohs.

This lion-headed spout drains the water from the temple's roof.

Beware of the Planet of the Apes!

Near the Temple of Hathor is the Iseum, dedicated to Isis and Osiris.  While smaller and less
impressive, this structure is newer, having been built by the Roman Emperor Augustus.

After we finished seeing the Temple of Hathor, Mahmoud inquired whether the road to Abydos was still open for tourist vehicles.  Once again, our guide was frustrated about the lack of information provided by the authorities.    The answer was a tentative 'yes.'  Officially, everything was clear, but the local cops vaguely warned him that we should maybe try another time.  There would be no other times for us.  It would be now or never.  So, we made a deal.  If there were one other car heading to Abydos, then we would go.  If nobody else were going, we would turn back to Luxor and check in early to our hotel.  Luckily for me, we found out that one other car was heading to Abydos (everybody else was turning back).  Sure that car had already left 15 minutes ago, but technically it was going.  Therefore, we piled into the van and headed off to Abydos.

The journey took approximately two hours.  To avoid some potential trouble spots, our driver took some back roads that tended to be a bit rocky.  At absolutely no point did we sense any sort of danger.

We passed lush green fields and farmland irrigated...

...by ancient canals extending miles away from the Nile River.

Trucks were packed high to the sky with sugarcane, the local cash crop.  Periodically, they would slow to a crawl as the road made a sharp turn.  Local boys would then rush up and steal a few sticks off the back of the trucks.

That's a lot of calories!

Despite the hot sun, most Egyptian males prefer not to wear hats. But when they do...

When we arrived at Abydos, the place was practically empty.  There were less than 10 tourists there.  Surprisingly, some of them had made the six hour journey from the Red Sea town of Hurghada.  While many pharaohs had constructed tombs here in Abydos, most were just symbolic.  Their mummies (and treasures) were buried elsewhere.  The main reason for tourists to visit is the Temple of Seti I.

The Temple of Seti I

He had constructed the building out of fine limestone (not sandstone like most temples), but his son Ramses II had completed the interior decor.  The temple is divided into shrines to the gods Osiris, Isis, Horus, Ptah, Amun, Re-Horakhety, and the deified Seti I.  Each one has elaborate decorations of offerings being made to these deities.  Six of the shrines have false doors in the rear of their shrine.  Only the one for Osiris has a real doorway that leads to a separate area of rooms dedicated to him.

Each column had illustrations of the god worshiped within the shrine.

The uraeus, a sacred snake, signified Lower Egypt.  The vulture was the symbol of Upper Egypt.

Egyptian men were colored in brownish-red, signifying tanned skin from working in the hot sun.  Women were depicted as a paler yellow, as they usually remained in the shade.  Some gods or deceased pharaohs appeared in dark or blueish-green hues, signifying death or fertility (as in the black soil around the Nile).

The carvings in Ramses II's monuments are often criticized as being less artistic and similar-themed (i.e. the Battle of Kadesh).  That is not the case here.  In my opinion, the decorations inside are some of the most detailed and intricate we have seen so far.  Half of them still retain some of their original faded colors.  This is truly paganism at its best.  Non-flash photography (not videotaping) was allowed inside.

Off to the left side is a hallway that contains illustrations of Seti I and a young Ramses II doing endearing father-son activities such as offering sacrifices to the gods and lassoing a bull.

The Boy and I will stick to less violent activities such as playing Gears of War together.

Near these illustrations of Ramses II and Seti I are two interesting pharaoh's lists, one containing their birth names and the other with their coronation names.

These lists start at Narmer and end at Seti I.  However, they selectively exclude Hatshepsut
(a female usurper) and the pharaohs of the Amarna period (Akhenaten, Tutenkamen, etc.)

Several pharaohs shared the same cartouche of their coronation name.  This must be confusing
to Egyptologists as there are as many eleven pharaohs who shared the name Ramses.

Behind the temple is a granite structure called the Osireion.  This is supposedly the place where the head of Osiris was buried.  According to Mahmoud, the Osireion was sometimes used by the ancients priests as a revenue stream for the temple.  Pilgrims could rent out the place to stay for the night.

The Osireion remains flooded for much of the year.  Recently, most of the water was pumped out.

Back at the entrance of Seti I's temple, we found the controversial hieroglyphs.  Carved into one of the roof beams are a tank, a submarine, and a helicopter.  Mahmoud scoffed that it is just an illusion created by pieces of the original plaster falling off to coincidentally form these objects.  I dunno.  That REALLY looks like a helicopter.  Besides, is it also coincidental that Seti could stand for the (now defunct) SETI (Search for Extraterrestrial Intelligence) program?  Mahmoud thought this was all crazy.  Come to think of it....Mahmoud has been very adamant in his denial.  What is he trying to hide...Maybe he is one of those Men In Black...

Evidence that helicopters, airplanes, and giant insects built the Great Pyramids.

At 2 PM, we were the last group to leave Abydos.  The drive back to Luxor takes about four hours, and it is best not done in the dark.  We checked into the Hilton which is a really wonderful property.

Our room at the Hilton

There are many lounging decks
mere yards from the Nile.

Although it's not really walking distance from the main attractions of the city, it didn't matter because the hotel has everything we would need.  The room was spacious--something we appreciated after being on a boat for the past few days.  There were several restaurants, gift shops, and even a shisha bar overlooking the river.  We were a bit disappointed that the gorgeous infinity pool closed at 6 PM.  However, we lounged on their large veranda with comfortable couches watching the sun set over the Nile.  The best part is that they had free WiFi in the public spaces, the only hotel we have stayed in that offered this.  We dined at the Hilton's Olives Restaurant, very affordable for a restaurant in a five-star hotel.  

Rolls

Mutabel (eggplant, tahini, and pomegranate seeds)

Olive puree

Grilled seabass, harrisa mash potatoes,
and a spicy saffron sauce

Date kunafa with vanilla ice cream

Shish kebabs and lamb chops

At the end of the day, I was very happy that we had a chance to see both Dendera and Abydos.  In retrospect, I really think that the "risk" of violence was very minimal.  I bet that the authorities were just being over-protective of tourists so as to avoid any bad publicity in case something catastrophic happened.  On the other hand, although she did enjoy the temples, The Wife, was less impressed.  She would have rather spent the extra six hours lounging at the Hilton.  I guess she's just not a Stargate fan.